Once Upon A Time...

Once upon a time there was a couple.  That couple had their problems.  In fact, one of the problems was so big that the couple eventually split up.  But before that, the couple were friends.

They were such good friends, in fact, that they promised each other that, no matter what, they would always be friends.  They promised that even if they broke up, that they'd always be nice to each other and try to be friends.  They owed that to each other, they said.

The couple had a baby, and when that baby was born they made another promise that they would never, ever, take the baby away from the other person.  They said that that baby deserved to be with both parents, not just one or the other.

Well, time passed, and the couple did break up.  It was very sad, and very hard for both of them.  At first they tried to keep their promises.  They were nice to each other, and even though they argued more than they had in the past.  Then things started to go bad.

She had done some very bad things, and had hurt him very badly.  He was angry and hurt - understandably so - and even though at first he tried to be nice, eventually that anger and hurt festered and he began to do and say things that were very mean and heartless.  Even though he had every right to be angry and hurt, the way he started to handle it was very wrong.

She tried to be understanding.  Of course she had her flaws, and obviously she had her selfish moments, but more than anything she tried to make sure he knew she was trying to make things as easy for him as possible.  She often asked, "You know I'm trying to help, right?" or said, "I don't want to make you feel like I'm taking advantage of you.  Do you feel that way?" and he would always tell her that yes, he knew she was trying to help, and no, he didn't feel taken advantage of.  On the few occasions he did, she tried to fix it.  Not everything could be fixed, of course, but she did try.

Above all else, she was concerned about their child.  She told him again and again and again that they could put on paper that he had her 51% of the time so that he could stay in his apartment and keep his BAH, as long as he didn't try to take the baby from her.  She knew that it was in the baby's best interest to have both parents.  She had a very bad feeling, though, and constantly asked him if he was going to try to take their daughter away.  He told her no, and she tried to trust him.  After all, he had promised, hadn't he?

Then one day he gave her permission to use his computer.  While she was on, she checked her email and Facebook, but he was already logged in. She found an email between him and his cousin.  In the email he had said that he was trying to gather 'evidence' to make sure that he had full custody of the child.  In another email to someone else he said very similar things.  She was devastated.  She copied and pasted the email, just to be safe, and sent it to herself.  She also found several other emails, proving he was doing very illegal things.  She was shocked at that, because he had always been the type to outwardly protest those sorts of things.  She copied and pasted those, too.

She asked him several times after that if he was trying to take their baby away from her.  She literally prayed that he would come clean and be honest with her, that maybe they could talk things out, and keep the promises they had made: to be friends and to never take their baby away from the other person.  But he continued to lie to her, and that made her very sad.

She was cornered; she couldn't let him take their baby, and he had been doing and saying some very mean and wrong things to her, and she couldn't let him do that anymore.  So she did what she had to do.  She almost backed out several times, but she knew it needed to be done.

Because of what she did he was told he had to move out of his apartment.  He was also told that he wouldn't be allowed to have their baby except for every other weekend.  It broke her heart and she cried when she did it, because their baby deserved to be with him, too, not just her.  It also made her very sad because they had promised....

After that he became very, very mean.  Even meaner than he had been before.  He started saying hurtful things, and talking to her in very inappropriate ways, even in front of their daughter.  When she asked him to stop, he'd simply say, "What's wrong with it?" or just ignore her.

She was very sad because of this.  Things had gone so badly, and it broke her heart.  She knew that divorce was a hard thing, but why couldn't they just be friends, like they had promised?  Why couldn't they at least be civil, for their baby's sake?  And, most of all, why couldn't their baby be with both of them?  Why did he force her hand into ensuring the child was only with her?  That wasn't fair to the baby.

The funny thing was, even though he had been very, very mean to her, and even though he had been trying to take their child away from her, she was still willing to keep those promises.  She was still willing to try to be friends, and to let him have the baby 50% of the time.  Not 51% on paper, not anymore, but still 50%.  If he would just keep his promises, and not try to take the baby away anymore, she would happily share the baby 50% of the time, because even though she loved having the baby 90% of the time, she knew it was best for the baby to have equal time with both parents.

Maybe one day she and he can be friends, or at least be civil to each other.  Maybe someday the baby can be with both parents, for equal lengths of time.  One can only pray.

The End.