String

I just read a very interesting article about love.  It had several questions that I'm going to answer on here, and then it talked about string.  I'll explain that in a moment.

The article was about how to tell if you're in love.  It was about a man's own experience.  He gives several questions to ask yourself.  The first one is "What does it feel like to say goodbye?"  When I say goodbye to J, I almost immediately miss him.  Even when it's just for the night, I miss him.  When I know there will be a day of separation, I'm constantly envisioning him close to me.  When we were apart for a week, I wanted to text or call him constantly, just to hear from him.  Now that I'm looking at another week long separation, my stomach twists in unpleasant knots when I think about being away from him.  It's not overwhelming, but there's some very obvious unhappiness about it.  I miss him.  I want to be near him.  To hear him and touch him and hold him.

The next question is "What is it like to kiss [him]?"  It's amazing.  It's like the world has stopped, even if only for a moment.  Even quick little pecks are wonderful.  Every time his lips touch mine I want to wrap my arms around his neck and hold him there forever.  I get butterflies every time, without fail.  My heart skips a beat and speeds up all at once.  Every time we kiss it's like the very first time, and I absolutely love it.

Next: "What makes you happy?"  Well, first and foremost it's my daughter, K, and her happiness and joy and laughter.  Second would be him.  Being near him.  Seeing him smile.  Hearing him laugh.  Knowing that he's happy.  Knowing that I'm part of the reason for that happiness.  Everything about him.  Watching him play with K.  Everything.

"Do you want it?"  Yes I want it.  I want all of it.  The ups, the downs, the good, the bad.  I want everything that being with him has to offer.  I want the happiness I feel with him, the smiles, the kisses, the conversations, the games of magic, all of it.  I want it all.

The last question is "How long is a piece of string?"  The answer: I don't know.  Just like with love.  There's no exact measurement.  No formula to determine whether or not someone is truly in love.  You have to look at it, measure it yourself, and come up with your answer.  Chances are very good that you'll be right.

What's my answer?  I'm in love.  I still can't tell him, but without a doubt in my mind, I love him.  I hope one day he'll love me too. :-3